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LA (AND BEYOND): THE BEST WEBSITE TO RIDICULE

By Nora Zelevansky / August 14th, 2009

Picture 5

So, here I am, innocently watching some late night Family Guy with Andre Vien, when a commercial comes on "the telly" that seems like a joke.  But it's not.  It's for "Online Booty Call" (or The OBC), which is apparently a service for "playas" looking for something "not too serious."

If the, ahem, founder (UM "doctor!!!" or so he claims) Moses Brown in the commercials is any indicator, though, it's actually a service for douche bags with little or no game and a surplus of hair gel.  Which, let's be honest, sounds a lot more on target.  Because what kind of hot dude with oodles o' biatches actually needs to listen to some guy, who fancies himself Will Smith in Hitch?  "I SAID 90-percent!"  Please.  Even Will Smith isn't Will Smith in Hitch.  Will Smith is like . . . well, who cares really?

Also, maybe this guy is a doctor, but I just find that a little bit hard to believe.  Especially because they left it off the text in the commercial.  The ad is genius BTW.  It's all about how girls totally hate guys who give them flowers and would much rather have their asses groped by sleazy eurotrash-looking dudes in lame commercials.  Of course, I might hate a guy who gave me a bouquet of babies breath too.  Way to spring for the quality flowers for the commercial, guys!

Anyway, the truth is this website is AMAZING.  It's totally good for like A MILLION laughs.  There's also a MUSIC VIDEO (YUP) for The OBC (that's Online Booty Call, bitcheeees) with inspired lines like: "No Cristal on this one, just red cups of Hennessy and Koolaid, daaawwg."  Cooooool.  Cause girls totally hate champagne and love red keg cups from the 99 cent store.

Okay, Okay, You Want To Cheat
That's The Bomb
Okay, Okay
W Dub Dot Com
Okay, Okay, Online Booty Call
Hit 'Em On The Web
Make 'Em, Holla At You Dawg

Seriously, I recommend watching the video at least eight times.  Like Hennessy and Koolaid in red cups, it just gets better with age.

xo – N.